The life of a scarecrow isn’t easy. They work long hours in all sorts of weather. Their job is isolated and not varied in any sense of the word. They’ve got one job and they do it without complaint. . . most of the time.

When they hung you in that field you knew that this summer job would be a lot worse than your gig dipping Dilly Bars last summer. Maybe you should’ve worked on your customer service skills. It wasn’t fun but you hung out there as the hot sun beat on your burlap. You kept a stiff upper lip in the evenings when you felt your hay body take on water from thunderstorms. When your pole started to slouch over in the soft soil you began to feel a little irritated.

Then those farm kids started using you for target practice and you couldn’t take it anymore, that was the last straw. How dare those kids shoot BBs at your chic brown tunic with the burlap accent pieces and it’s cute patchwork skirt? You might be a scarecrow but you still look good. As you saunter through the corn you begin to come up with a plan. You’re sick of scaring crows, it’s time to expand your resume. Those kiddos will be scared stiff when you show up at their Halloween party.

This scarecrow costume will harvest plenty of fear this autumn. For someone who’s been hanging in the field all year, you don’t look bad at all but it’s about time you left that corny job behind. Maybe next summer you can find work as a clown. Everyone loves a clown, right?