Just Another Day at the Park

Your friends did warn you when you took this job. “What employer needs you to take out a raptor insurance policy?” they asked. Don’t worry, you reassured them. All you have to do is feed the animals, and they’ll be safely in cages. Plus, have you ever seen a baby diplodocus? So cute!

Well, it’s true that pint-sized dinosaurs are adorable. It’s also true that Jurassic Park seems to have a few, shall we say, technical issues. The gates seem to malfunction in heavy rainstorms. Nobody seems certain whether the T-Rex’s cage is completely jailbreak-proof. Oh well. You’re just here to give the Allosaur his breakfast – wait, why is the cage open? Did you hear something?

Product Details

Slip into this exclusive Jurassic Park Employee Costume for Adults and be instantly tranformed into a privileged person who sees incredible animals on a daily basis. Your friends will beg you to take them to work with you – as long as you stay alive! The gray jumpsuit is super comfortable: perfect for lifting heavy feed containers or for running for your life. The “Jurassic Park” patch near the left collarbone gives that extra touch of authenticity. The orange hard hat with the matching logo keeps the uniform OSHA-compliant, but hasn’t been tested yet against Tyrannosaurus teeth. Oh well! We’ll probably never have to worry about that.

Plot Twist

Ok, don’t panic. The Allosaur is missing, and he seems to have opened his friends’ cages. That’s not a big deal. You can survive this. You’re fast, and smart, and you’re wearing a great uniform. It’ll be fine. What’s that dropping on your shoulder? Is that rain, or dino drool? We’re going to hope it’s drool!